


Loving Someone Like That

by remymarin



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Courfeyrac is a joker, Enjolras bullies Grantaire because i'm mean, I'm sorry but so is Enjolras so, Les Amis - Freeform, M/M, also bahorel can be very badass, asexual!Combeferre, demisexual!Enjolras, just saying, not really just in this fic but like always, pretty much all of the amis even though some of them aren't mentioned, seriously though Grantaire has to put up with a shitload of shit, slight platonic Jehan/Enjolras, yeah that didn't really work out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-18
Updated: 2013-12-18
Packaged: 2018-01-05 02:10:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1088362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/remymarin/pseuds/remymarin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I believe in you.”  </p><p>Those words and Grantaire’s sincere eyes had twisted Enjolras's stomach into hard knots.  He kept repeating to himself that he had only known Grantaire for a few months, he hadn’t even seen his apartment, or had a proper meal with him, or a sleepover – </p><p>He quickly diverted his thoughts away from sleepovers.  Nope.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Loving Someone Like That

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic on this site and of course it's e/R. ^-^ It's also my first attempt at writing demisexual!Enjolras so i hope i did okay with that. I might write more fics with demisexual!Enjolras even though it's not my main headcanon for him.

\-----

Enjolras never thought he would get close enough to someone to love them. Not really. 

Of course, there was Combeferre, his best friend for practically forever, but they had tried that, once, in high school. 

It had been nice, Enjolras supposed, but it hadn’t worked out. Combeferre hadn’t liked how physical Enjolras had been, even if it was just holding hands, or a chaste kiss. 

In the end they’d both agreed to just be friends. 

There was Courfeyrac, but he was too much. He was in love with life and with the world around him, and, for sure, Jean Prouvaire. 

Enjolras didn’t mind. He was close to Courf, but not that close. 

He realized after several futile dates that being a demisexual was hard. Why didn’t anyone understand that he needed to be friends first, needed to grow close to and learn to love them? Why did everyone try to kiss him, making him shy away awkwardly, and cough, explaining how he was in short, stuttering sentences, even though he had already explained how he was, and how the way his heart worked. 

None of them called him back. 

He gave up on dating and refused any attempts Courfeyrac made to get him out and ‘into the field as a playah,’ as he had put it. It wasn’t worth it. 

He was lonely, but, oh well. Jehan was a sweetheart and didn’t mind cuddling, and Courfeyrac didn’t mind Jehan doing that either. He knew that the relationship Jehan and Enjolras had was platonic. 

He wanted to kiss someone, but he didn’t know who. Lying in his bed at night, sometimes, Enjolras felt like crying, because he couldn’t picture anyone. He’d never been able to. 

When he met Grantaire, he half hated him. The guy was a drunkard, a cynic, an asshole, sometimes a stoner. Enjolras didn’t understand why Jehan had brought him into the group, but Grantaire did seem to get along with the others. 

Enjolras did protest, but halfheartedly, and only to Combeferre. 

“He’s a nice person, En,” Combeferre had said absentmindedly while on his laptop. Enjolras got the feeling that Combeferre had only half heard what he had been saying. “Sure, he’s got vices, but don’t we all?” He glanced up, as if daring Enjolras to protest. 

Enjolras hadn’t been able to. 

Insulting Grantaire was easy, almost too easy, and even though it made him feel bad, he did it. The dark haired man was just . . . so easy. He opened himself to so many insults. 

He knew he was treating Grantaire like shit from the way the others looked at him. Jehan glared at him from Courfeyrac’s lap and wouldn’t talk to him for the entire night, Combeferre arched an eyebrow that clearly asked him ‘what the hell’, and Bahorel just came out and said it. 

“What the fuck, man. He wants to be here, which is surprising after how you’ve treated him.” 

Enjolras looked up at Bahorel in surprise, then back at Grantaire’s blue grey eyes, noticing for the first time that they were full of more than cynicism, that R was hurt; his breath left his chest in a whirling gasp and he felt more ashamed of himself than he ever had. 

And later, when he and Grantaire were talking – what he had said, Enjolras was never going to get over what Grantaire had said. 

“I believe in you.” 

Those words and Grantaire’s sincere eyes had twisted his stomach into hard knots. He kept repeating to himself that he had only known Grantaire for a few months, he hadn’t even seen his apartment, or had a proper meal with him, or a sleepover – 

Enjolras quickly diverted his thoughts away from sleepovers. Nope. 

But that night, when he was lying in bed all lonely, per usual, he found himself accidentally thinking about Grantaire again, about his pretty eyes and his paint-spattered fingers and his curly dark hair and the way he always had just a little stubble, just a little. 

That night, when he closed his eyes and imagined kissing someone, the person had a face. 

And he realized that maybe he could love someone like that.

**Author's Note:**

> Of course Courf is a joker and that's why he was trying to set Enjolras up. He does recognize and respect his friend's sexuality. ^-^ How could i write a Les Amis fic without Courfeyrac attempting to be witty? xD
> 
> I'm remymarin on Tumblr as well, and i'd love it if you checked out my blog. c: 
> 
> Thank you for reading! ^-^


End file.
